June 1, 2009

Clueless

Directed By: Amy Heckerling (All the "Look Who's Talking" movies):

Cast:
Alicia Silverstone - "Cher"
Stacey Dash - "Dionne"
Bitch from 8Mile
Mike from Friends
Dr. Turk
SK8R boi / Pothead
Rich Boy
Closet Boy
Nerdy female teacher
Nerdy male teacher
Daddy
A bunch of other people

Story:

Very loosely based on Jane Austen's, "Emma."

Veriew:

High school teenagers in Beverly Hills some who have been "named after singers who now do infomercials."

They constantly change outfits, have nose jobs, talk in a very grown up vocabulary on their giant mobile phones, and concern themselves with everybody elses, except their own, social lives.

How ditzy, rich or popular can one girl be? Cher can be all three things quite easily and still have perfect style, blond hair and a manicure. She lives in Beverly Hills and attempts to drive Jeep. With her best friend, Dionne, whose a sassy Barbie too, she's got it all.

Or has she?
When she starts flunking at school, she uses everything her lawyer daddy taught her and negotiates with her teachers for better grades, giving them every excuse from boy problems to women's troubles. Most of the teachers except these excuses, except for Nerdy Male Teacher.

Enter ex step brother, Mike from Friends, college student, Eco warrior, plaid flannel shirt wearing, grunge music listening, all round nice guy. He offends Cher by basically calling her selfish, she needs to prove him wrong.

New girl, Bitch from 8Mile, comes to school and Cher decides to do the unselfish thing and make her over. But Bitch from 8Mile's crush for Rich Boy, is soon ended when he makes a move on Cher!

Don't fret her heart's mended by good clean Closet Boy.

Cher then does everything to attract Closet Boy, who is later revealed to Cher to be gay!! So much for all her hard work.

Cher also does a spot of match making on Nerdy Male Teacher and Nerdy Female Teacher, in a way to up her grades.

Then Bitch from 8Mile gets freaked out by some idiots at the mall, and becomes more popular than our lead Cher! Cher then becomes "way confused" when Bitch from 8Mile starts falling for Mike from Friends.

She realises she feels annoyed cause she loves Mike from Friends, he's "kind of a Baldwin."

She then decides she needs to give her soul a makeover. She does charity work, in an attempt to impress Mike from Friends, he soooooo notices her now! And she does more match making between Bitch from 8Mile and SK8R boi / Pothead.

She then learns that Mike from Friends is in love with her! And they kiss on the big marble staircase!

Nerdy Male Teacher and Nerdy Female Teacher get married, with Cher being Maid of Honour and all.

Through all the up and downs, the heartbreaks and the drama, Cher finds true love and isn't so Clueless anymore!

Bonus Clueless Lingo:
"Whatever" - I don't really care.
"A Betty" - A gorgeous woman, a reference to Betty Garble.
"A Baldwin" - A gorgeous man, a reference to the gorgeous Baldwin brothers, except for Stephen and Daniel.
"Full on Monet"- To look nice from far away but up close, not so much.
"Ralph" - To vomit.
"Wiggin" - Irritated
"Way" - Very. Eg. "That teacher was way harsh!"
"Buggin" - Freaked out.


Verdict:
It's easy to watch with not brainpower involved. Butter the popcorn and leave your common sense at the door.